• operator: 911, please hold.
• me: stop murdering me for a sec; we're on hold.
• murderer: ok

When you see someone using the pencil you lost

most-awkward-moments:

if you’re human or cat, you’re gonna love this blog. 

(Source: takinoverswag)

• dad: i don't understand why black guys love asian girls so much
• mom: it's because we have nice hair. duh and it's real